Well, it's Sunday and I'm at work and guess what? The system's just been taken down.

Am consoling myself with a fried egg sandwich, marvelling afresh at the beauty of the colours when white bread, golden egg yolk and red ketchup combine in layers.

And a colleague is cracking open a tin of chocolates… not that I'm going to eat any of them, oh no.

And we won't mention the biscuits I had half an hour ago- that can be our little secret, okay?

Edit: things are looking up – the system's working again and management have just phoned Domino's with a big pizza-and-potato-wedges order…